A Tense Situation

This one almost slipped through the cracks. At the time I wrote this, I'd only written a few stories in the present tense. Since then, I've written an entire novel in present tense. It's more popular now and less of a novelty but I did wonder whether it was the right choice. So I began to tell the story in past tense and I couldn't sustain the voice. It's not just changing "is" to "was" but the past tense gives a vehicle for more self-reflection. No, this story had to be told in the present tense. And soon I'll be able to share it. I am both petrified and excited all at once.  


From the web archives: A Tense Situation

I always wrote in the past tense, thinking it more appropriate since everything I wrote about had happened in the past.  It also seemed foolish to write in the present tense – how can a character write and walk, talk, and jump off cliffs at the same time?  It was pretentious.  But for one of the Institute's assignments, I wrote a story in the present tense simply to flex my writing muscles.  It felt right.  The story was based on a personal experience.  While I wrote the first draft I went back into time and re-lived the experience.  All the emotions were at my fingertips.  Later I embellished the story and it became a work of fiction.  When my teacher’s reply came back, one of her comments was on the use of tense.  She suggested I use the past tense.  I tried it.  But wonder of wonders, I preferred my story in the present tense.  I analyzed why it was effective and there were three reasons:

1.     The story was in first person.

2.     Present tense heightened tension.

3.     The reader implicitly did not know how the ending would be.

THE POWER OF PRESENT TENSE

There is a certain immediacy to writing in the present tense.  It doesn’t all have to be action either.  There is time for introspection.  An action sequence can be alternated with an interior monologue.  The character’s voice can come through.

My throat is tight and I feel the words getting stuck.  I open my mouth but no sound emerges.  Finally, I spit and stutter, “B-b-back off.”  Randy backs off and I can breathe again.   

Randy is only trying to help but he’s pushy.  It’s not like I don’t know how to swim.  I’m a poor swimmer.  And given half a chance, I can save myself.  I’ve been saving myself from disasters since I was born.  Like the time when I was six.  I forgot to turn the faucet off and the entire universe flooded.  Randy brought towels.  Like that was going to help.  Randy is like that – he always means well, but he ends up being a total pain.

I paddle and float, enjoying the cool water.  Randy watches me, ready to save me.

I purposely have a long passage.  Notice that back-story is effortlessly revealed by using past tense.  There is no need to use the past-perfect form (had forgotten, had flooded), which is what you have to use if the main story is written in past tense.  Here is the scene written in past tense.  I think you’ll agree that it's clunky.

My throat was tight and I felt the words getting stuck.  I opened my mouth but no sound emerged.  Finally, I spat and stuttered, “B-b-back off.”  Randy backed off and I could breathe again.

Randy was only trying to help but he was pushy.  It wasn’t like I didn’t know how to swim.  I was a poor swimmer.  And given half a chance, I could save myself.  I’d been saving myself from disasters since I had been born.  Like the time when I was six.  I had forgotten to turn the faucet off and the entire universe had flooded.  Randy had brought towels.  Like that would have helped.  Randy was like that – he always meant well, but he ended up being a total pain.

I paddled and floated, enjoying the cool water.  Randy watched me, ready to save me. 


THE TENSES – NUTS AND BOLTS

If you’re feeling tense, let me go over the basics.  Remember, tense is the timeline of your story.  If you use your tenses carefully, your readers will stay with you and not get lost.  They will know the chronology of events even if you present them out-of-order.  The technique of jumping right into your story and revealing the past bit-by-bit, like peeling the layers of an onion, is well-suited for middle-grade and young adults as well as adults.

Simple Tenses:  An action occurs in the past or present or will occur in the future.

     Present:  Today Billy rides a bike.

     Past:  Yesterday Billy rode a bike.

     Future:  Tomorrow Billy will ride a bike.

Perfect Tenses:  An action occurs in one time-zone but is seen in relation to another time-zone.

     Present perfect:  Billy has ridden a bike many times (and will continue to do so).

     Past perfect:  Billy had ridden a bike all afternoon (until he fell off and broke his leg).

     Future perfect:  By next summer Billy will have ridden a bike for a year.

When things happen at the same time, the tenses of the verbs have to be the same too.

     Right:  When Jack calls, Billy rides a bike to meet him.

     Wrong: When Jack calls, Billy rode a bike to meet him.

Within a sentence, things don’t have to refer to the same time, and you can use different tenses.

     Billy says he rode his bike yesterday and will ride it again tomorrow.

Confusion between will and would:  Use will for the present, would for the past.

     Present:  Billy says he will wear his helmet.

     Past:  Billy said he would wear his helmet.


BE CONSISTENT

If you write in the present tense, make sure you stay in the present.  You can slip into the past BRIEFLY while your character remembers something or talks about the past.  Back-story requires past tense.  But the thoughts and actions must remain in the present.  It isn’t confusing one bit.  In fact, it can be more puzzling to have a story in the past tense and have flashbacks and interludes in the past-perfect tense explaining current behavior.

WHEN TO USE THE PRESENT TENSE

Is it possible that some stories are better told in the present tense?  I think so.  Stories with a lot of reminiscing and non-fiction are best told in the present tense.  Recently I read an adult novel, Sister Of My Heart by Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni.  She used present tense for the entire story with alternating (first person) viewpoints between the two main characters.  The effect was stunning.  She went over the past through dialogues and interior monologues, had lots of action and even went over the girls’ dreams, without confusing the reader.

In writing non-fiction you are dealing with general truths.  Forget your old science projects, where you had to do an experiment and then write the results in the past tense with a passive voice.  That’s a sure-fire way to put a kid to sleep.  I’m talking about inviting the reader into your world of bouncing balls, sleeping bears and shooting stars.

Why do balls bounce?  The key word here is ELASTIC.  During a bounce from a hard floor, the ball gets a dent.  All of its energy is put into flattening itself against the hard floor.  As the ball returns to it’s rounded shape, it releases that energy into upward motion.

So give the present a whirl and see how you feel about your writing.  Chances are, it will feel fresh.


"A Tense Situation" was first published in the Jan. 2003 issue of ICL's Rx for Writers.

Dialogue -- It's Not Just Talk

You all must think I'm a blogging maniac (3 posts in as many days :) but I needed to refer to this article and discovered it still wasn't live. So resurrecting this from the web archives: Dialogue -- It’s Not Just Talk

“Stop!”

“Molly’s gone!”

“That can’t be right.”

These are the first lines of three different stories.  Notice anything?  They all start with a child talking.  Forget setting and description.  Open the child’s mouth and hear what that child has to say.

 Three Ways to Use Dialogue

“Stop!” yelled Tim.  Amy whirled around.  “You left your stuff.”

“Thanks,” said Amy, taking her backpack.  She felt silly for running down the hall.  She’d already missed the bus.

Let conversation carry the plot.  There is time for narration and back-story.  Why was Amy running down the hall?  Maybe Tim and Amy will take a walk together and discover something.  So will the reader.  Weave action and description with dialogue.  Your readers should be able to see and hear the characters in their heads.

Too often, we start our stories too early.  By the time we understand our character’s background, the reader is yawning and reaching for something else to do.  Chances are, if you involve the reader immediately in the story, he or she will understand our character’s motivation by the end of the story.

I don’t mean that you should always start your stories with people talking.  Sometimes, a sentence or paragraph is required to set the mood.  But just as an exercise, try writing a scene beginning with talk.  Take your story-child to a park, a zoo or a bus-station.  Let the child talk and find out what happens.  You may be amazed at how fast the story unfolds.  Let dialogue quicken the pace your story.

Watch children at a library or a bookstore.  They will flip through a book and select a snippet to read.  And more often than not, they are reading dialogue.  Dialogue means at least two people talking.  It is not idle chit-chat, unless you want to show that the character is concerned with the trivial.  Dialogue moves the story forward.  And it gives the reader a chance to get to know the characters you have created first-hand.

Give everybody talking a unique voice.  For that, you have to let your characters talk in your head.  A young child may speak of being scared of the dark or loving the whoosh of the slide.  An older child may complain about homework.  A teenaged girl may agonize over and over-analyze the actions of a boy she likes.  Foreign kids may pepper their speech with their native language.  Let your characters talk to YOU.  I do that and sometimes the chattering in my head is so loud that I cannot sleep at night.  Although this may seem like an insane thing to do, you won’t regret it.  My characters love to talk and they do things that surprise me.  I pick up my pencil and scribble down what they’re saying as fast as I can.  Let dialogue bring a flat, puppet-like character to life!

Dialogue: What It’s Not

Staying true to your characters doesn’t mean that you must use slang, bad language or dialects.  It is distracting, difficult and entirely unnecessary.  Readers will supply the accent when they read it.  Dialogue is meant to resemble people talking, not a literal transcription.  My very first writing teacher, Peggy King Anderson, said, “Dialogue is the illusion of conversation.” 

Five Rules to Remember:

Dialogue is one place where your mechanics can get sloppy.  So brush up.  You don’t want to have a great story sent back because the editor is wary of working with someone who is careless. 

Rule 1.  Always change paragraphs when you change speakers.

“Molly’s gone!” said Tim.

“She’s in big trouble,” said Mom, glaring.

Rule 2.  Tag your dialogue. 

It isn’t always clear who said what in a long exchange or when the characters first start talking.  Help the reader, especially the beginning reader.  It’s enough to say, Tim said, said Mom, etc.  Keep it simple.  You’ll bring attention to the tags if you use perfectly correct verbs like, responded, answered.  Use them sparingly.

Rule 3.  Make sure your characters say, speak, yell or shout those words.  The words will NOT glare, laugh or blink.

Wrong:  “She’s in big trouble,” glared Mom.

Right:    “She’s in big trouble,” said Mom, glaring.

Right:    “She’s in big trouble.” Mom glared.

Rule 4.  Use correct punctuation.

Spoken words and punctuation marks, like commas, periods, question marks, dashes and exclamation points go inside the quotation marks.  Do not capitalize the beginnings of tags unless you start a new sentence.  Here is a scene containing several examples of correctly punctuated dialogue.

“That can’t be right.”  I think aloud in my math class.

“What?” asks Mr. Hatch, turning around.

“You can’t divide by a minus b,” I say slowly, “because earlier you had set them equal to each other and division by zero ...”

“...is illegal.”  Mr. Hatch completes my sentence.  I hate that.

Rule 5.  Read it aloud.

I always read my stories out loud to see where I stumble.  But reading dialogue aloud will help you to hear whether the speech sounds natural.

Dialogue:  it’s not just people talking.  Let it carry the plot, quicken the pace and bring your characters to life.  Lee Wyndham said it best.  “Let them do the talking!”

For a master class on Dialogue check out Barbara Linn Probst's article on WriterUnboxed: A Dozen Solutions to the “Dialogue Tag” – Writer Unboxed 

References:

1.     John C. Hodges et. al.  1994.  Harbrace College Handbook (Twelfth Edition).  Harcourt Brace College Publishers.

2.     Vincent F. Hopper et. al.  2000.  Essentials of English (Fifth Edition).  Barron’s Educational Series.

3.     Lee Wyndham and Arnold Madison.  1989.  Writing for Children & Teenagers (Third Edition).  Writer’s Digest Books.

 
"Dialogue: It's Not Just Talk" was first published in the Oct. 2003 issue of ICL's Rx for Writers.

Stretching and Winning

Tooting my own horn here:
From the web archives: Stretching and Winning

I’d never won anything in my life – the lottery, a door prize, or even the booby prize. I’ve come close in contests. When I was in graduate school, I won an honorable mention for my poster. The judges enjoyed playing with my removable model of a protein twisting and folding with the help of another protein. How I longed to win.

My days of scientific pursuit are long gone. I exchanged them for children and children’s literature. To stretch my writing this past year [2004], I have been entering the Institute of Children’s Literature (ICL) contests. I tried writing a mystery story, but failed because I only had some dead chickens, a couple of dogs and a boy. I had no plot, no motivation; therefore, no story. I’m definitely not a mystery writer. But I tried. In other categories, like picture books and nonfiction, I thought I submitted a good story, but when I read the winning entries, I knew I wasn’t even close. When the sports stories came up, I thought, I am not athletic, never have been and don’t know a thing about sports except how to play with ropes and sticks and stones. But I took the challenge, writing about a game that I played with sticks as a child in India. It placed in the top twenty. [And was published in Fun for Kidz in 2006.] Wow! I was stretching. Getting better. Perhaps I should draw more upon my own experiences.

I bought Writing from Personal Experience by Nancy Davidoff Kelton. It made me examine my own life and draw upon it for emotional truths. I suppose I’ve always done this instinctively – all my stories have some element of truth in them. But I didn’t dig too deep. Too emotional. Too painful at times. But I’m learning that there’s gold deep down. For one of the writing exercises, I wrote about the time I taught my mother to drive. It made me laugh. And cry. I miss my mother, even now, after she’s been gone from this world for twenty years [now 30 :( ]. 

When I saw the ICL contest for contemporary young adult fiction, I knew I could write a story about a girl teaching her mother how to drive. It felt fresh – it’s not the typical teenage experience – the tables were turned. I anchored it in Pullman, WA, where I spent many years, and the details made the story come alive. Perhaps because I was missing my mother so much, the story, which started out funny, took a sharp turn with the mother heading to her grave. I drew upon those memories when I knew my mother would die. I cried when I wrote the first draft. Two Advils later (I always get a headache when I cry), I knew I could shape it into a story that was cohesive. It took me a month to polish and I submitted “Driving Lessons” to the ICL contest, with all my hope.

The day that the Caldecott and the Newbery winners were announced, I got an email as well. Sandy Stiefer was one of the ICL judges. I knew then, that I was in the top five. Why else would she want to talk to me? But imagine my happiness and inflated ego when she told me that I won! I cried again. Quietly and quickly. After all, this was going to be my first time to be interviewed as a writer. Sandy told me that there were over a thousand entries. And my story stood out the very first time she read it! My kids peeled me off the ceiling. I carried this wonderful secret inside me for a few hours. That night, I wrote to my family and friends. I wished and wished that I could talk to my mother. She would’ve been proud of me. I dug deep, stretched a bit more, and won my first writing contest.

I have stories to tell. You do, too.

"Stretching and Winning" was first published in June 2005 issue of Kid Magazine Writers.

 

Update: Oddly enough, Driving Lessons story hasn't sold. There aren't many markets for YA short fiction. But this may become a chapter in a book (it's half baked right now). Too many ideas, not enough time. LOL.

Catch a Judge's Eye

It's only fitting I post a picture of myself with my best helper. Hmmm, I think here I was judging a school writing contest.

From the web archive: Catch a Judge's Eye

Last year (2007), I had the pleasure of serving as one of the judges for the Magazine Merit Awards to recognize outstanding works of writers and illustrators published in 2006. Over Christmas vacation, after the deadline for nominations had passed, I read by genre, made notes and concluded that all stories aren’t created equally.  Some were merely competent.  Many were good.  But there were the exceptional few that stayed with me, transformed me, wowed me.  It was truly an educational and eye-opening experience for me as a writer.

What caught this judge’s eye?  Stories and articles that surprised, educated, and entertained me.  Poems that begged to be read out loud and illustrations that leaped off the page and into my imagination.  Let me give you some examples.

FICTION

What separates a good story from an award-winning one?  Voice.  It’s seems so elusive, but voice is how you or your characters say things, see the world, choose what to pay attention to, and ignore. 

Consider Rosie the dog, narrator of “Stinky Treasure” by Jacqueline Adams (Highlights, Apr. 2006).  Rosie’s (mis)interpretations drive the story.  She thinks: “Garbage is so special that no one is allowed to touch it.”  In the end Rosie concludes: “A dump must be a place where people store their garbage after it gets stinky.  So a dump is ... the most wonderful place of all!”  You’ll have to agree that Rosie’s voice is unique, fresh and funny. 

Highlights for Children editor, Marileta Robinson, remembered this piece fondly.  “It was our fiction contest winner, which means that it rose to the top amongst 1,500 entries.  We all enjoyed the sly good humor of this lovable character.”

There are no new stories, right?  Only old stories told in a new way.  Consider folktales.  What makes them fresh?  Evocative language.  A new setting.  A different viewpoint.  In Patricia Bridgman’s retold Chinese folktale, “One Thousand Dragons,” (Cricket, July 2006), a young girl discovers her power and uses it to escape an evil emperor.  I literally felt ten thousand dragon wings flap as they came to life when Ling painted their eyes.  Deborah Vetter, Editor at Cricket, said, “It reflects a powerful folktale motif in which the character brings a painting to life and escapes death or slavery.”  She added, “At Cricket we love folktales, and we love seeing the same motifs crop up in stories from all over the world.”

“The Wednesday Club” by Anna Levine (Cicada, Jan./Feb. 2006) touched all of our hearts with its honest and hopeful portrayal of a young girl whose mother battles cancer.  Later, I discovered that Levine’s sister had passed away from breast cancer.  The story was written in her honor. Vetter said, “Anna was determined to get it right.  She and I worked through several revisions, and I was so proud of her when she nailed it.  She poured herself into the story.”

Passion.  It’s the heart of a story.  Revision.  It’s work that lets the reader feel your heart.

NONFICTION

The best nonfiction articles were highly focused.  “Treasures in a Pinecone” by Jan Black won my heart (Highlights, Dec. 2006). The author wondered, like a child, why pinecones are sometimes closed and sometimes open. It was a personal account, simply told, a great introduction to science and to the power of observation.  Melanie Hope Greenberg, my co-judge said, “Lovely visual language, calling seeds ‘treasures’, hearing pinecones ‘crackling’ open.”  Robinson summed it up in one word: “enthusiastic.”

Children enjoy reading about famous people.  And little-known facts about them make great magazine articles.  Both Trish Early and Barbara Kerley wrote focused articles about famous people: “Ben Franklin: Fit for Life” (Highlights, July 2006) and “Josiah, the White House Badger,” (Highlights, Apr. 2006) respectively.  Both articles were meticulously researched, evidenced by their vivid and telling details.

Many articles started off with a bang, then lost steam and momentum shortly afterwards.  Compelling nonfiction grabs you by the throat and reels you in with every tasty morsel.  Two outstanding articles that succeeded in keeping my interest to the very end were “Libby or Liberty” by Tracey E. Fern (Cricket, July 2006) and “The Town Underground” by Claudia Cangilla McAdam (Cricket, Apr. 2006).  Cricket’s Vetter remembered these pieces vividly.  “Tracey Fern is an author who knows how to find the ‘story’ in ‘history’,” said Vetter who also commented on how astounded everybody was by the idea of an underground town.  She said, “What ingenuity, what novelty, what an exotic life in the Australian desert!”

A great magazine piece keeps the excitement, the sense of awe and discovery, no matter its length.  Vetter said, “We look for a premise, excellent research, the ability to explain difficult concepts, and a creative approach that will bring the topic alive for young readers.” 

ILLUSTRATION

Pictures that jumped off the page were my favorites.  I could literally feel “Winter Clothes” (poem by Karla Kuskin) that Mary Bono illustrated (Highlights, Jan. 2006).  It had texture.  Robinson remarked that Bono had knitted all the adorable little clothes herself.  

Judge Greenberg, herself a visual artist, said of Karen Lee’s cover art for Highlights for Children: “Delightful characters that are alive, everything is in motion, not static.”

POETRY

Anna Levine’s “Saxophone Summer” (Cicada, May/June 2006) sizzled.  We loved the syncopated rhythm that sounded like red hot jazz.  In contrast, Cynthia Porter’s “How Many Moons?” (Spider, Feb. 2006) was quiet and reflective.  Natalie Rosinsky, my co-judge said, “A small gem, where every word is aptly chosen and emotions of awe, appreciation, recognition of fleeting time, and a sense of place are conveyed so vividly and economically.”

Both Robinson and Vetter confirmed our gut reactions.  Poetry is the shortest, most precise form of writing, and you either get it or don’t.  There seems to be no middle ground. “Editors tend to disagree wildly on any manuscript submission.  Poetry is especially subjective; so is humor.  What makes me laugh out loud can leave my Editor-in-Chief scratching her head – and vice versa!” said Vetter.

WINNING STORIES

My favorite pieces stayed fresh even after repeated readings.  The passion for the topic shone through.  Months later, I’m still thinking about them.  So, write what you love, what piques your interest, and publication and recognition will surely follow.

 
"Catch a Judge's Eye" was first published in the Jan-Feb. 2008 Bulletin.

Cover art by Thacher Hurd.

Chautauqua Musings

Update: The Highlights Foundation holds all its workshops in Honesdale, PA now. I had the wonderful opportunity to attend Sharing our Hope workshop with Kristi Holl and Paula Morrow three years ago but what I learned at Chautauqua still holds true.  

From the web archives: Chautauqua Musings

Chautauqua: a single word.  A place.  But so much more than that.  For me, the Highlights Foundation’s 2006 Writers Workshops at Chautauqua was a place to learn about children’s writing from some of the best authors and editors in the field.  What is unique about Chautauqua is the family atmosphere, the caring and the passion.  Faculty and students enjoy meals together and are available to talk shop, family, or hobbies.  I will always be grateful to the Highlights Foundation for helping me to make my Chautauqua dream come true.

Here I am with my friend and critique partner, Allyson Shrier, and with my astute reader and advisor, Stephen Roxburgh.

 

 

Some musings and advice:

Do not be put off by the high cost.  Scholarships are available.  Invest in yourself and your future.

The most common thread of successful writers was that they read a great deal.  This might seem obvious, but I’ve met writers who are “too busy” to read.  So read, read, read.  Read the classics.  Read contemporary literature.  Read poetry.  Read magazines.  Read good books.  Read badly written books.  You will learn something from all of them.

Author Jerry Spinelli was an exception to this rule; he did not become an avid reader until he was older.  But he wishes otherwise.  Perhaps his journey to being published would’ve been shorter.  Remember, it’s never too late to start reading.

Speaking of the Spinellis, take lessons from them.  Between them: six children, sixteen grandchildren and over sixty books!  They still write in between the cracks.  So can you.

Many authors talked about writing just one or two pages each day.  Some, like Donna Jo Napoli, can finish a draft within a month.  Others take three months.  Some take a year.  But they all emphasized finishing that first draft, whether it’s a magazine piece or a trilogy.  Capture the passion and the emotions of the story.  Let it pour out of you.  There is plenty of time later to revise and edit and polish, which can take months to several years.  But get it all down first.  Don’t stop to edit.

Should you outline or not?  Depends on what works for you.  Many let a story unfold as they write, and the first draft serves as an outline when they revise.  I use an outline because I write a great deal of nonfiction and it’s imperative that facts follow each other in a logical order.  I bring that to my storytelling.  I like knowing where I’m going and whether it makes sense.  I write narrative summaries.  But that doesn’t mean that my story is set in stone.  Often, the actual writing of a particular scene (for me it’s almost like transcribing a snippet of a movie) leads me in a slightly different direction, but one that is truer to the character.

Publisher and editor Stephen Roxburgh discussed plotting.  Plot is the sequence of events.  They must be connected.  He cites author E. M. Forster: The king died.  The queen died.  This is not plot.  However, if you said: The queen died of grief, then you have a plot.  Know the motivation that leads to action.  He was my reader and advisor and he asked very good questions about my story.  He had no answers; rather, his questions helped me to find out what my story really is about.  So ask yourself questions, particularly, “Why?”

Author Carolyn Coman taught storyboarding.  This appealed to me very much because I use index cards.  She draws boxes and draws the major action, then she writes what is happening.  Finally, she writes what the main character feels.  Is it joy, fear, sadness?  I think storyboarding is an excellent tool for keeping track of the emotional journey of the main character.

What should you write about?  Anything and everything.  Writers have the right to write.  Do not hesitate to write about China if you’re not Chinese, but do have passion for China.  Write about something you care about, otherwise your readers won’t care either.  If you don’t know enough to write, learn.

Research thoroughly.  Use primary sources whenever possible.  Editor CarolynYoder said, “Through good research come great stories, juicy details, and anecdotes.”  She gave many practical tips for keeping the mountain of information that you will collect while writing nonfiction or historical fiction:

Keep a detailed bibliography.

Footnotes save you hours during revisions and fact-checking.
Contact experts for guidance.

 

But always remember the story, because we read stories to feel.  We read stories to be in someone else’s skin.  We read stories to understand ourselves.  Editor Patti Lee Gauch read aloud passages from some of the best historical fiction and, in each case, story was paramount.  Information was imbedded within the story.  She said, “There can be no fiction without facts.”

So cultivate the craft of writing.  Read books, take classes, pay attention, and write.  Use beautiful, sensual language.  Be a virtuoso.  Make your reader hear the music.  Discover your own voice.  Write your heart out.

"Chautauqua Musings" was first published in the Fall 2006 issue of The Chinook.

Barbara Seuling's Manuscript Workshop

My friend and mentor, Barbara Seuling died yesterday. Her obituary is in PW. She was not only a wonderful writer, but also a great teacher. I read and re-read her book on writing for children for many years until I outgrew it. My kids loved her series of Robert books. And Barbara's favorite, the story of Jane Froman was a joy to read. I got another copy for my in-laws and they, too, loved it. I can only imagine how many hundreds, no, thousands of people she has touched with her words. I had the good fortune to spend some time with her at a workshop twelve years ago, which I wrote about below. Requiescat in pace, Barbara. 

From the web archives: The Workshop

I have never had a "writing vacation" until I won a full scholarship to attend Barbara Seuling's Manuscript Workshop.  When she called with the good news, I was preparing dosas for my children.  We were all so excited I had to turn the stove off before I burned the house down.  The workshop was a gift to last a lifetime. My mother-in-law came to stay with the children and care for them while I was away so that Michael could continue to go to work. 

For four days, I was in the company of writers.  Good writers.  Each story pulled me.  I wanted more.  And it made me think about how we come up with stories -- a scenario, a character, even a piece of dialogue can snowball into a story.  It was a pleasure to read our stories and give and receive constructive criticism. 

I cannot say exactly what I learned because there were no formal lessons per se.  Everything I learned was specific to improving a particular story, but these are some of the points that were driven home:
 

1.  Tell yourself the story.  How does it unfold?  Why do story people (or animals) do the things they do?  Know the motivation.  Even in a deceptively simple picture book, we must know why the character does what he does.
 

2.  We read excerpts from several novels.  Every scene in the novel must move the story forward.  Otherwise it has no business being there.  It is not sufficient to have a scene just to give back-story or description.
 

3.  Read, read, read widely to study structure and style.  Especially read in the genre that you're trying to write.  Know what is being published today.  Read the classics, too.
 

The students: Carolyn, Sheryll, Doris, Lee, Becky, Syrl and Vijaya.  We did writing exercises and critiqued from 9-12 in the mornings and from 7:30-9 at night.  We socialized during mealtimes and it was wonderful to have delicious food come to our table while we spoke of our families and writing life.  We became friends.  I enjoyed having all of our activities under one roof at the Landgrove Inn.
 

The afternoons were free.  Most of us worked on our manuscripts.  We took breaks for a walk in the woods or a swim in the pool.  There was a lot to process (I'm still digesting what I've learned and trying to apply it to my novel).
 

Guest speaker Melissa Stewart spoke about her love of science and bringing it to life for children.  Tips from her:
1.  Make your writing lively. 
2.  Go for the heart of the story. 
3.  Do your homework and then interview experts for information not readily available.
 

Barbara runs this workshop in an environment that is conducive to writing.  We are guided from the discussions about our craft.  I truly believe that to become a better writer, we must honestly assess our work alone and with others and work with writers who can teach.  Barbara is one of the best.  She has a generous soul.  And she's funny and astute, too.  It's no wonder that out of seven students, over half have attended these workshops several times.  What joy to learn from Barbara and her students.  I know I'll be back ...
 

From the left: Barbara, Vijaya, Melissa, Becky, Doris, Sheryll, Syrl, Lee & Carolyn.

 

Query Letters -- A Personal Journey

From the web archives: Query Letters: A Personal Journey

“We do not accept unsolicited submissions.”  How many times have you read those dreaded words in marketing guides?  But your article is just perfect for Dig or Faces, you moan.  So how do you get your foot in the door?  By way of a query letter.

Conquer Fear:

I feared writing a query letter, thinking that I couldn’t possibly explain how wonderful my idea would be, that my manuscript would speak for itself.  So, I targeted magazines that only accepted unsolicited submissions.  I got lucky with Ladybug soon after I started submitting.  But there were other magazines that I enjoyed reading that I wanted to write for, like those of the Cobblestone Group, that did not accept unsolicited submissions.  All their magazines are “themed,” that is, on a particular topic, and writers are told to query their idea.

The Odyssey:

I took the plunge when I looked through Odyssey’s theme list and saw one on bioterrorism.  Right up my alley, I thought.  No, I am not a terrorist.  But I was a former scientist – and microbes were my specialty.  And after fifteen years of thinking about how microbes do their good and bad deeds, I knew I could write an article for this issue.

I was like a kid in a candy store.  So many choices!  I decided to stick to the ones that had the most meaning for me.  I chose to write about smallpox and anthrax.  These topics were my starting points.  And related ideas kept coming and coming and coming.

Rough Drafts Can Really Save You:

I confess.  I did not write the outlines as the guidelines required.  I wrote rough drafts, gauging how many words I’ll need for each of the articles.  I didn’t want to say that I could explain the science behind smallpox in 500 words.  My rough draft was 2,000 words and I got a good sense of what I could cover in say, a thousand words, pulling ancillary information into sidebars.  Then, I wrote the outlines.

I carefully read Odyssey’s guidelines, again.  They wanted a detailed outline of the proposed article with references.  New writers needed to submit either clips (published articles) or writing samples.  I decided to send them two of my scientific papers, even though they do not match the writing style of Odyssey, because that’s all I had published.  I debated sending them a short sidebar so they could see a more appropriate writing sample.  I also had an article on the ICL website, and Mel Boring, then editor of the ICL website, suggested that I let my outlines and scientific background speak for itself.  And was he ever right!

The Query Letter:

I wrote a one page query letter – that’s a rule of thumb for me and I have yet to violate it.  I think that editors have too much stuff to read anyway, so it’s best to use the KISS principle – keep it short and simple.  Here is part of my first query letter:

Dear Ms. Lindstrom,

I would like to contribute to the March 2004 issue (Secret Agent: Understanding Bioterrorism).  Smallpox has been a scourge upon us for most of our history.  That it has been eradicated is an achievement that speaks volumes about the ingenuity of men and women.  I propose three related articles about smallpox.

1.  Smallpox (900 words) will describe the history and biology of smallpox.

2.  Lady Mary (400 words) will illustrate the practice of deliberately catching smallpox.

3.  A shot in the arm – how vaccines work (400 words) is exactly that.

NOTE: Everybody should practice telling what their book or story is about in ONE line.

In the next two paragraphs, I told her that I was a former scientist along with a list of meagre writing credits, three to be exact.

My closing paragraph:  Please let me know whether you would be interested in working with me.  Odyssey is one of my favorite magazines and I would be proud to be a contributing author.  Thank you for your time and consideration.

Even though it was my first query and I didn’t have a lot to razzle-dazzle the editor with, I was professional.  I was honest.  Emboldened, I sent her another query two weeks later on Robert Koch, who studied anthrax and laid the foundation for modern microbiology.  People often advise you to send only one thing at a time, because you would be competing against yourself.  I definitely agree, but in this case, I went with my gut feeling and passion for the topic.  I also felt that I had nothing to lose. 

Max and Dagny at the time of that first query! I don't think I slept much ...

The Call:

Two months later, I got the call!  The editor was soft spoken and my children were very excited along with me, so it was hard to hear.  After we all calmed down, the editor said, “Your query letter was impressive, but can you write for children?”  I assured her that I could.  After all, if I could write for Ladybug, which had a younger audience than Odyssey, I could surely write for Odyssey.  She accepted every single query!

During our conversation, the editor explained how she planned to put the issue together and so to change the slants on two of the articles.  Later, when we were casually discussing bioterrorism in the news, I mentioned monkeypox and SARS (Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome) and the editor asked me whether I could write about them, too.  And without missing a beat, I said, “Yes.”  She took a huge chance on me – an unknown writer – and I will forever be grateful to her for giving me this opportunity to grow and develop as a writer.

I had two weeks to write all the articles.  I was glad to have rough drafts for some of them.  Out of nine feature articles, I wrote four.  I also wrote two sidebars.  This was my publishing debut in the kid-lit world.

I continue to write for Odyssey on topics that fuel my excitement.  I’m happy to say that almost everything I’ve queried has been accepted.  The editor knows that I deliver the goodies on time.  I have even gotten a call to write a story for a particular issue without making a query.

I no longer need to write rough drafts twice as long as the intended article.  I dive straight into the outline with catchy phrases and things I know I want to cover.  And I no longer fear writing that query letter.  They have opened doors to even book publishers.

Writing Exercise: 

Summarize your story in a single page – double spaced – about 250 words. 

Now tell your story in a single short paragraph, about fifty words. 

Find the essence and pack it in a single line.

If you do this for each and every story, not only will it clarify your thinking, you will be ready to query.  Some publishers ask for a one page query letter with outlines and sample chapters and others ask for only the one page letter. 

Go forth open doors with a query.  I wish you luck.



"Query Letters: A Personal Journey" was first published in June 2005 issue of ICL's Rx for Writers.